if only my heart were stone.

odysseus, on his journey home to ithaca, was visited by a ghost. the ghost tells him that once he reaches his home, once he slays all his enemies and sets his house in order, he must do one last thing before he can rest. the ghost tells him to pick up an oar and walk inland, and keep walking until somebody mistakes that oar for a shovel... for that would be the place that no man had ever been troubled by the sea, and that's where he'd find peace.
Who I Follow
lx34e:

me and my friend arriving at an all you can eat buffet 

lx34e:

me and my friend arriving at an all you can eat buffet 

(via dandymagpie)

itskellykline:

LOOK AT ITS LITTLE DOUBLE CHIN

(via zombie-lady)

captainamericaisavirgin:

blackzephyrus:

captainamericaisavirgin:

feminism never made me hate men but the reaction to feminism sure as shit did

some men* you literally cannot hate people you’ve never met or even heard of.

oh MY GOD OH MY GOD OHH M Y GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OHHHYM GOD OH MY GOD OH MY OD OOOOOH MY GOD oh MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD O H MY GO D OH MY GOD O H M Y GO D OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

(via emrysofgallifrey)

super-star-destroyer:

did-you-reboot:

dmonarkworld:

cyborglovesong:

Dating advice from Commander Shepard.

OMG

Shep no

Holy shit this is exactly what it said on the tin.

milestaylorcosplay:

spooktercrunk:

abhorticulture:

thecakebar:

Surprise! Gender Reveal Cake

  • A Gender reveal party is where the parents throw a party (similar to a baby shower) to find out the gender of the baby! 
  • No one knows the sex of the baby (just the party planner/bakers know!)
  • The gender is revealed when the parents cut the cake open and the inside color of the cake/desserts reveal if the baby will be a boy or a girl! (pink is usually used for girls, blue for boys of course!)

mine was full of wasps. HUGE WASPS.

"what’s the baby’s gender?" the eager party goers ask, crowded around the cake

slowly, the knife cuts through the first piece. “wasps.” the proud parent-to-be whispers, “wasps.”

one thousand wasps are released from the gender cake.

And now, the weather.

(via emrysofgallifrey)

adventuretimeandsuperjailrock:

If this isn’t good marketing I literally don’t want to know what is.

(via ozmone)

Mist and shadow, 
               cloud and shade,
                             all shall fade,
                                            a l l   s h a l l   f a d e .

(via forestsandfoxes)

h0odrich:

trashabasha:

h0odrich:

i want a lewey vatton wallet

You don’t deserve that fancy ass wallet of you can’t spell the designer!

whatever i still have my koko shanelle shades cant even see u

(via songlord)

ihaveseenthed:

sucymemebabaran:

miniprof:

bird seller, i need your strongest bird

image

THIS WAS A MISTAKE

my birds are too strong for you, traveler

(via emrysofgallifrey)

(via hcfrick)

suicidebyfacepalm:

oh you’re playing mass effect?  i love that game, the way they just [clenches fist] effect all that mass

(via wardens-oath)

hakuna-mataataa:

Everything runs off the same energy system. Really Powerful image set.

And yet we do not see the signs. Yet we do not remember.

(via emrysofgallifrey)

If you were hoping to manipulate me, you are barking up the wrong tree.

(via rackhambonny)